So I’m baking Pecan pies for the visitation today. Rough weekend. BF and I are fighting, or to be more accurate, he’s fighting and I’m hurt and apathetic. He said he was sorry, but he continues to act the same…so I guess not really sorry. I’m mostly over it. by it I mean this whole “relationship” where I’m not as good as his family, and not allowed my own feelings, or to be unchaperoned. I want my life back. I want to be happy. I want to trust the people around me instead of constantly expecting the next (verbal) sucker punch. I’m not happy. I’m semi-content, but nowhere near my best self. Time to start moving in a new direction. We’ll see if I have the nerve and the strength and the heart to try again, again.
I WILL survive, and maybe thrive…someday.