Baking, Visitation, etc

So I’m baking Pecan pies for the visitation today.  Rough weekend.  BF and I are fighting, or to be more accurate, he’s fighting and I’m hurt and apathetic.  He said he was sorry, but he continues to act the same…so I guess not really sorry.   I’m mostly over it.  by it I mean this whole “relationship” where I’m not as good as his family, and not allowed my own feelings, or to be unchaperoned.  I want my life  back.  I want to be happy.  I want to trust the people around me instead of constantly expecting the next (verbal) sucker punch.   I’m not happy.  I’m semi-content, but nowhere near my best self.  Time to start moving in a new direction.   We’ll see if I have the nerve and the strength and the heart to try again, again.

I WILL survive, and maybe thrive…someday.

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